=rem #18339 Use explicit handshake timeout

* instead of using transport failure detector
* add a new config property akka.remote.handshake-timeout, but
  for netty.tcp and netty.ssl the existing netty.tcp.connection-timeout
  setting will be used
* add test of the timeouts
* mima filter for internal ProtocolStateActor

project/MiMa.scala

@@ -34,7 +34,8 @@ object MiMa extends AutoPlugin {
 
   val mimaIgnoredProblems = {
     import com.typesafe.tools.mima.core._
-    Seq()
+    Seq(
+      FilterAnyProblem("akka.remote.transport.ProtocolStateActor"))
     
     // FIXME somehow we must use different filters when akkaPreviousArtifact is 2.3.x
     /* Below are the filters we used when comparing to 2.3.x